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Friday, March 6, 2009
Sian.... hmm.... long time nvr post le. shall post abt ytd and today :D
Thursday first lesson was math. dunno why since math lesson i was feeling very weird. weird in the sense that i have the feeling that today wont be a very smooth sailing day. probably becoz i was sian diao by the fact that i would be released at 3.40pm today, which is so the damn late, compared to other classes. aft math was recess. ate with friends :D then was CID. coz chem assignment was due today so i brought chem assignment to the LT1 to do when the ppl present. i know its not very polite, but i alr 泥菩萨过江，自身难保。i cant finish by hw le, i cant afford to listen to the presenters. but i am very good, i did plan to set aside time when it was zimin, joyce and kahkah's turn to present. :D see i so good. so conclusion is i tot CID was a time for me to slack and complete my chem assignment. but who knows ms chia kel-li suddenly call ppl to come out and comment on the presenters' works. i was feeling really wrong at that time, and i was telling abigail that later ms chia ke-li would call me. my sixth sense told me that. and when ms chia kel-li called 3B, my heart was pumping like mad and the growing sense of dread was increasing. and when she called register 5, which is kahkah, i didnt feel relieved. somehow i have a feeling that no matter what i would be called. AND I WAS CALLED. WTH. my first instinct was: what can i do to escape from it. so i was abt to tell everyone to say register 17 is not here when louis shouted out" its wenqi!" OMG. i wan to escape also cannot le. so i accepted the fact and i totally embarrassed myself. and i mus have been super nervous facing the numerous faces in front of me. much love and thanks to zimin, joyce and kahkah who gave me support by smiling at me and mouthing to me abt what to say. that made me cool down a little. then i just blurted anything that came into my mind. i can't even recall what i said ytd. and in the end i passed over the mike back to ms chia, she asked me not to jump about when presenting nxt time. i dun care lor, its me, and i can do what i want. you anyhow call me out without giving me time to prepare my wise speech then you expect me to present properly meh? i so nervous until anyhow jump wat. i cant control it lor. its me, and you have to accept it coz i bother to come out to present you mus 偷笑 le ok. wth. dunno how to appreciate other's effort. then aft CID we went to LT5 for chem. i shant explain why LT5, coz my post is getting so long. my group went thru Q&A, and another 2 groups presented. then was lang arts, got back lang arts test. i got 11.5/25, which is a fail. but i wasnt too shocked or upset, coz i knew i did my best. i really did. but after that i check the marks is teacher count wrongly. wth, so i add 1 mark become pass ON THE DOT. how great :D at least i passed, and my hard work is paid off, but not very well though. :( physics. went through ws 2 and teacher gave intro of new topic. then was lunch. chinese after that. was quite ok coz mdm lam wan let us play game. actually my grp could have won one lor, if only we didnt drop into some kind of bloody trap and got 炸到粉身碎骨by the 日本军的飞机. die also cannot die in one piece. how sad is that. almost fail lang arts still need to be killed in this way. went home aft that, did art and math. then sleep le. dreading tmr coz i think i pulled my tendons or ligaments or whatever that is, and i think i cant do split for the time being. :( Friday first lesson was supp to be math, but mr ng change with mr choy so as to finish off the presentations. second lesson was physics. learned new topic. seems quite easy. easier than previous topics. but i cant expect much. i just passed physics you know. 15/30. pro right? i was a bit disappointed coz i rly studied for phy but i still pass with dull colours. WHY?? sometimes i really feel that its not worth doing so much, when you studied so hard yet your results are the same or even lousier than a person who didnt study as hard so you did. :( recess. was damn hungry lor. then was lang arts, saw my combined results for the oral presentation and lang arts test. got a freaking B4. i shant elaborate how i felt. its like i have just fallen down from the PSA building (for your info, PSA building is 40 storeys high, a building beside our sch). that's exactly how i felt. i am in bicultural yet my languages suck like that. miss ong said in a bicultural class, our aim for lang arts and chi mus be at least a B3, to consider ourselves as bilingual, something that bicultural students should possess. so what does that mean? i am not fit to call myself a bicultural student. i did badly for chinese this time round too. teacher was going thru the chinese test answers and i was like asking myself why didnt i think of that at that time when i was doing my chinese test. at that moment when mdm lam wan was gg thru the chinese paper i knew the right answers, yet i didnt know why i chose the wrong ones during the test. haiz.... forget it. after saying so much i realised i have bombarded my mother with earth shaking news of my almost failing results these few days. wonder if she can take it. next week i am gg to receive bicul and chem test, and i think my mum's gonna have a heart attack soon. let her hav a break over the weekends first before i start to 轰炸my mum with my lousy results. hmmm... then was free period. wanted to do math, but i didnt know why i cant think of anything related to math. the qns are so unfamiliar to me at that point of time. i guess i am really getting more and more stupid. its jus a matter of time till i fail my math too. art. was so lame. but managed to finish the impt things on time la. ate with taikee, zimin and tianli, then went for cca. jiti gun again. i am so demoralised. i am always the one lagging. so lousy. but at least aft today's trng i realised which parts i am weak at and i would try my best to improve. i am still optimistic after all. :D my scholarship is bound to be taken away. i am failing all my subjects, and i dun even have the confidence to hit GPA 2.5, much less say 3.0. there is no more bright side for me to look at now. so i can only be pessimistic at the moment. i am tired. i shall go and sleep now. sleeping early would make me grow taller. even tho i alr very tall la and always block the ppl behind me, but i am born to be tall, cant help it lor. SS501 FIGHTING!!!{4:14 AM}
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